


Gold

by summerpsycho



Category: 5h - Fandom, camren, fifth harmony - Fandom, fifth harmony camren
Genre: Camren - Freeform, Clinic AU, F/F, F/M, Fifth Harmony - Freeform, M/M, Multi, fifth harmony camren - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-04-05 04:11:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4165317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerpsycho/pseuds/summerpsycho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>18 year old student Lauren Jauregui has had to deal with OCD her whole life. Something knocks her off the edge and she lands herself in the Miami Mental-Health Youth Center for teens. She is forced to spend 7 months there. She meets different people, including newcomer Camila Cabello. Watch as Lauren meets people she'll remember forever, and people she'll want to forget. In the end, was it really all worth it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I

"Lauren," Jacob says, throwing a ball at the wall beside Lauren's head. She groans, turning over in her bed to face away from the boy. "Lauren," he says once more, throwing the ball at the wall again.

"Why, Jesus God why, do you decide to wake me up at 8:43 every morning, without fail?" She says, turning back to face her friend and checking her watch, (even though she already knew it would be 8:43).

Lauren had been in the Miami Mental-Health Youth Clinic for around three months now, and ever since Jacob was assigned to be her roommate, she would be woken up every morning at 8:43, on the dot.

"843 is my lucky number." He says, grinning. He stands up, shoving his stress ball into his pocket. "Come on; breakfast is in 17 minutes." He says with a smile on his face.

"You know," Lauren says, sitting up in her bed slightly and rubbing her eyes, "Considering I've been here longer than you, I'm pretty sure I'd know when breakfast is." She said, smiling.

He rolls his eyes before stretching slightly and cracking his knuckles. "Maybe if you'd stop being such a sarcastic asshole, I'd consider saving you a breakfast burrito while you shower," He says, pausing, “Because you really do stink.” Lauren eyes him carefully.

"Don't fuck with me, Whiteside. Breakfast burritos are not things to joke about." He laughs, "I'll take that as a 'yes, thank you so much Jacob for saving me a breakfast burrito while I shower because I smell like a corpse!'"

Lauren laughs, standing up out of bed and stretching before quickly giving him a one-armed hug, "I owe you." Jacob smiles, "Yeah, well, whatever," he says, "Don't get too sappy on me now Jauregui." He finished, playfully punching her arm.

"Wouldn't dream of it, squirt." She says, ruffling his hair. He rolls his eyes once more before leaving their room.

Lauren stretches again, bringing her hand up to her mouth as she yawned. She walks over to her wardrobe and frowns at how barren it looked (which made sense, considering she'd been in the clinic for the last three months).

She hadn't had any opportunities to go shopping, and she sure as hell didn't trust her mother (or her father, for that matter) in buying her new clothing.

She wasn't too sure about her feelings at the moment. She wasn't sure whether she actually liked this place or despised it. She liked the idea of getting better, (even though she knew she could never be "normal") but she wasn't too keen on the idea of going through a challenge like this in a, well, a mental-health center for teens.

She’d thought about it a lot, and that was the problem. She thought too much, and half the time it wasn’t even wilful thinking. Lauren had lived with OCD ever since she could remember. She handled it well, the doctors didn’t think it was severe enough for medication, so she pushed through and dealt with it (or tried to) by herself (and with the support of her family).

However, when she had gotten to high school, her OCD had progressively gotten worse. She’d spend hours on miniscule tasks, trying to complete them perfectly, not stopping until she considered them to be correct and she’d barely get any sleep due to the intrusive thoughts bombarding her mind at 1 AM every night (and those weren’t even the worst parts).

Once this had begun, her parents had immediately taken Lauren back to the doctors who suggested she start on medication, which actually worked for a while. Lauren’s Freshman and Sophomore years weren’t as bad as what was to come.

Once she had started Junior year, it was as if she was back to square one. She would try to sleep to block out her thoughts, but it almost never worked. She repeated things much more than she used to, and the thoughts just kept getting worse and worse.

She suffered from anxiety then onwards, her stress building up so much that she would have pretty much regular anxiety attacks. She then had to attend regular counselling sessions to speak about her problems, even though she knew it wouldn’t help her that much.

It was when school was coming to an end and Summer was rolling in when Lauren began to feel better. She was honestly convinced that the medication had, in fact, began to work again.

However, about a week before school was about to start, a week before Lauren's first day as a Senior, she lost it. The thoughts had been coming back to her slowly, and once she remembered how little she had left of her summer break, her stress levels went up and all the thoughts came rushing into her mind at once.

It was as if she was being suffocated. She couldn't stop these thoughts racing through her mind, she never could. Lauren had ended up repeatedly hitting her left temple against her bedroom wall, in an effort to stop the thoughts.

That was August 27th.

She remembers waking up in a hospital bed, her brother and sister leaning against each other in the uncomfortable looking hospital seats, fast asleep, and her parents stood, watching her. Concerned expressions everywhere.

That was when Lauren realized she needed help. Well, she always knew, but she didn't realize how bad it had gotten until she actually acted out.

The doctor's worried when Lauren reacted in such a violent manner and decided that it was best if she were to stay and be assessed at the Miami Mental-Health Youth Center, because then the doctors had more control of what they could see and do.

That was why Lauren was here.

Lauren sighed, stretching once more before grabbing a towel and her phone and wandering into the bathroom she shared with Jacob. She ran the shower and jumped in almost immediately, not caring about the temperature of the water.

Lauren had always preferred cold showers to hot showers. Hot showers felt stuffy. Cold showers felt fresh, and clean. Once she had finished in the shower, she quickly towel-dried her hair, slipped into her jeans and a t-shirt and headed to the den room (that was what they called the dining/living room).

Upon arrival, she spotted her friends already sat at their usual table. As promised, Jacob had an extra breakfast burrito saved on his plate. She smiled, slipping into the seat next to her friend Mahogany and opposite Jacob.

“For you.” He says, handing her the burrito. She laughs, “Thank you.” she replies, taking a bite out of the strange breakfast food (she didn’t realize how hungry she’d been until then).

“Nice shower?” Mahogany asked suggestively and Lauren shifted in her seat. Mahogany and Lauren had previously been quite… involved with each other. It was nothing special, not love, anyways. More like a fling to keep Lauren sane.

Lauren had ended up breaking it off with Mahogany when she realized she wanted something real, and Mahogany couldn’t give her that. Ever since, Mahogany had continued to make suggestive comments, thus making Lauren extremely uncomfortable.

“Yeah, actually; it was great.” Lauren replied, smiling simply. Mahogany rolled her eyes and Jacob laughed.

Lauren heard people talking behind her and turned her head slightly to see someone she really didn’t want to see. Brad. Lauren got along with most of the people in the clinic, except for Brad and his weird posse.

Brad had always been unjust and rude to her and her friends. Probably because he was a homophobe, and both her, Jacob and Mahogany all happened to be gay (well, Mahogany went both ways).

She was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard Brad said the phrase ‘fresh meat’. She turned around fully in her chair to face him, “There are new kids coming in?” He frowns, “Eavesdrop much, Lauren Dyke-y?”

Lauren rolled her eyes, “Can you just answer me?” He grimaced, but then proceeded to nod, “Yeah, fresh meat should be getting here right about now, actually.” He said, grinning.

Lauren sighed, turning back to face her friends, “You guys hear that?” They nod and Lauren bites her lip.

Most new kids that came here were usually really shy, which was understandable, but it didn’t help that Brad tried to scare them away and freak them out. That was another reason as to why Lauren disliked Brad.

He was inconsiderate, which was funny considering he was also going through the things the ‘newbies’ are going through. Rumour has it he’s been here for little over a year, so surely he should understand how they’re feeling? Does he have no empathy?

Just then, Lauren hears a shout and stands up, letting her food fall back onto Jacob’s tray. “Did you guys hear that?” Mahogany shrugged, “It was probably just a newb or something. Whatever.” she said and Lauren frowned, “Do you not care?” Mahogany laughed, “Why should I? Their problem, not mine.”

Lauren scowls at her, pushing her chair under the table and walking away, “You’re unbelievable, Mahogany.” Lauren said, walking away. Lauren heard another shout, this one a little louder, and sounding slightly more like a scream. She followed the noise, walking through corridor after corridor until the screams got louder and she was stood in the visiting room corridor.

Lauren saw a girl, around her age, at least, sat leaning against the wall of the waiting room. There were bandages wrapped around both her wrists and she was shaking, multiple nurses and workers crowding around her. Lauren jogged over, moving the people out of the way, “Give her some space, people! Jesus Christ!” she said, kneeling down in front of the girl.

The girl was shaking, hugging her knees to her chest. Her head was buried into her knees and Lauren tenderly placed her hand on the girl’s upper arm, quickly moving it away when the girl flinched, “Hey, hey, calm down,” Lauren soothed, moving slightly closer to the girl, but keeping some distance between them

Lauren could recognize an anxiety attack when she saw one.

“Can you hear me? My name’s Lauren. I know this must be tough for you but can you listen to my breathing? Can you try and copy my breathing?” Lauren asked, waiting for a response. The girl lifted her head up and nodded slightly, biting her lip. Lauren couldn’t help but admire how beautiful the girl was, even at this moment in time. She had long, dark brown hair, and her eyes were transfixing.

Lauren pulled herself out of her haze, realizing what was more important, “Okay, good. Now just listen to me, listen to my breathing,” Lauren said, taking a deep breath in through her nose and breathing out through her mouth, continuing rhythmically.

The smaller girl copied her and Lauren smiled, "That’s great. Now, try and think of something that makes you happy, and carry on breathing, okay?” Lauren said and the girl nodded, smiling wryly. The girl kept her eyes squeezed shut, suddenly grabbing hold of Lauren’s hand. Lauren squeezed it reassuringly, and after around 15 minutes, the girl seemed to have calmed down a little. Lauren didn’t even notice the mound of people that had crowded at the end of the corridor, watching Lauren and the girl intently. She saw Jacob and Mahogany and sent Jacob an ‘okay’ sign with her hands.

He smiled and headed off, Mahogany following after him, looking uninterested. Lauren rolled her eyes, turning back to face the girl, who was now sat a little more upright, her legs stretched outwards. She was looking a little faint.

“Hey, how you feelin’?” Lauren asks the girl. She laughs, “D-Dandy...” the girl replies, sending Lauren a lopsided grin. A few minutes go by and before Lauren smiled slightly at the girl, “You know, we could just sit here all day on this cold, hard floor,” Lauren says, “Or, you could tell me your name and we could sit somewhere a little less…” Lauren frowned, tapping her knuckle against the tile floor, “Rigid?”

This earned a small laugh from the girl and Lauren grinned, “I’ll take that as a yes for option two, then?” Lauren says, standing up, her hand still clasped in the smaller girl’s hand. Lauren outstretches her other hand for the girl to take and the girl takes it, lifting herself up, keeping a tight grip on Lauren’s hands to steady herself, “Camila. Camila Cabello. 17. Guitar player and pizza eater.” the small girl replies, looking down at their clasped hands before blushing slightly and releasing them.

“Well, I’m Lauren, Lauren Jauregui. 18. Volleyball player and sushi eater… Wait, I already told you my name, didn’t I?” Camila nods, giggling slightly.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Camila. Even if the circumstances are a little, different,” Lauren thinks for a moment before speaking again, “Are you hungry? There’s still like, 20 minutes left of breakfast.” Lauren said, checking her watch, not knowing what else to say. Camila shook her head, “Usually, yeah, but, I’m feeling kinda nauseous right now…” Camila replied, staring back towards the door from which she had entered the actual clinic ward.

“I know it’s hard, but you do get used to it, trust me.” Lauren says, trying her best to smile bright for the girl in front of her. Camila smiled, “Thank you, I appreciate that. And, what you did earlier. Thank you, again. No one can usually calm me down during my anxiety attacks.” Lauren shrugs, “Well, I guess it helps when you get them regularly.” Lauren said, shrugging before momentarily thinking back to her last anxiety attack and grimacing.

Lauren helped the girl to sit down on one of the waiting room chairs and paused for a moment, thinking. “I’m gonna go get you a bottle of water and, like, some fruit because- well, you look like you’re going to pass out and- yeah. Any preferences?” Lauren asked, scratching the back of her head, her hair still slightly damp from her shower.

“Bananas.” Camila replied and Lauren smiled at her, glimpsing down at the girls arms for a moment. Her wrists were bandaged up pretty tight. Lauren began to wonder what had happened to the girl, when suddenly Camila rolls down her sleeves, looking away from Lauren and staring at the floor. Lauren bit her lip, feeling bad. It really was none of her concern. Lauren took the girl’s uncomfort as a sign to head off.

She walked back down the corridor and back into the den room to get Camila some water and (as requested)  a banana. “Who was that? Was she the newbie?” Jacob asked, walking up beside Lauren. Lauren nodded, grabbing a Banana from the fruit bowl and a bottle of water from the mini fridge, “Her name’s Camila. She’s your age.” Lauren replied, leaning against the counter slightly before walking away, “I’ll catch up with you guys later, okay?” Jacob nodded, giving her a quick thumbs up before walking away in the opposite direction.

"One Banana and one bottle of water, as requested." Lauren says, walking up to Camila and sitting beside her. Camila takes both the bottle of water and the banana graciously and immediately peels the banana before biting into it.

"God, thank you. I didn't realise how hungry I was," the girl says, laughing for a moment, "which is funny considering there is never a time when I'm not hungry." Lauren laughs, “I completely agree.” Camila looks up at Lauren and smiles, “Thank you, for this, I mean, you’re ridiculously nice.”

Lauren smiles, her cheeks suddenly feeling hotter, “It’s really no problem, I-” before Lauren could carry on, she was interrupted by one of the clinic counselors, “Hey there, Lauren and- Who’s this?” Lauren turns her head to face the woman, “Hey, Dee. This is the new girl, Camila.” she said, gesturing towards Camila. Dee turns to face the younger girl, “Hey there, Camila.” She says, stretching out her hand towards the girl. Camila takes it and smiles, “Nice to meet you.” Camila says, smiling shyly.

“You too I hope you’re settling in here,” Dee says, pausing for a moment. “Well, anyways,” Dee said, releasing Camila’s hand and turning back to face the older girl, “I was looking for you. I was going to ask you to show the new kid around but… It looks like you’re already on it. I swear you’re psychic.” Lauren laughs, “I prefer the term ‘genius’.”

Dee rolls her eyes, “Hilarious. Well, have fun, you two,” she said, turning to walk away before pausing and turning back to face the girls. She stops in front of Camila and hands her a few papers, “I almost forgot: these are your papers. They have all the main stuff on them like your room number, your class times and your counselling session times. Lauren will show you around and help you get settled in, okay?” Camila nods and Dee heads off, giving the girls a quick thumbs up and a smile..

“So, that was Dee. She likes to call herself the ‘kool’ kounselor’,” Lauren said, making air quotes with her fingers, “‘Cool’ and ‘Counselor’ with a ‘K’, though. Obviously.” Lauren said and Camila laughed, taking a sip of water, “She seems nice. Better than all the other counselors I’ve seen, anyways.” Camila said, grimacing at whatever thought had came to her mind. “How many have you seen?” Lauren asked, interested.

Camila ignores her question and stands up, “So, you gonna show me around or what, Jauregui?” Lauren takes this as a sign to change the topic of conversation and nods, standing up and looking through the papers Dee had given Camila. She scans the papers to find her room number and laughs, “Looks like you’re gonna be my new neighbour.” She said, walking down the corridor, Camila following.

They arrive outside Camila’s room and Lauren opens the door for her, “This is it. Room 3113. Looks like you don’t have a roomie. You’re a lucky girl, Cabello.” Lauren says, smiling. Camila laughs, “Which room are you in?” “3112. Hold on,” Lauren said, placing Camila’s papers on the girls bed before leaving Camila’s room and walking into hers. She walks over to her side of the room and knocks on the wall. She gets a knock back and laughs, heading back out to Camila’s room. “Great. Now we can communicate through morse code.” Camila says and Lauren laughs, “Sorry, I only know English and Spanish.” Camila’s face lit up, “Yo hablo español también!” Lauren laughed, “No way. I thought I was like, the only Spanish speaker here. Where are you from?” “I’m Cuban-Mexican. You?” Lauren laughed, “No way. Both my parents are Cuban. But, I was born here in Miami.” Camila grinned, “That’s awesome.”

The two girls continued to talk for hours. They spoke of family, their schools, their friends, music, everything. None of them asked or told why they were in here. They both just assumed that the other would tell them when they were ready, and they were both okay with that. Just as Lauren was about to tell Camila a funny 3rd grade memory, she’s interrupted by a knock on the door. Moments later, one of the late-night nurses walks in, pursing her lips, “Lights out, ladies,” she quickly looks to the door and frowns, reading the small board that told people who was in which room, “Come on, Jauregui, this isn’t your room.” Lauren sighed, standing up and heading out. Before she left, she turned to Camila, “Meet me outside my room at 9:05?”

The smaller girl nodded and smiled before the nurse began to usher Lauren out of the room.

As Lauren walked into her room, a large smile on her face, she felt content. She’d made a new friend today, someone who seems to be crazily similar to her. Not that she didn’t like having Jacob and Mahogany around, (okay, maybe she wasn’t the biggest fan of Mahogany) but being able to talk to someone who shared a lot of her interests was refreshing.

Jacob raised an eyebrow as Lauren entered their room, staring at the girl’s face. “Why are you grinning like an idiot?” Lauren rolls her eyes, “What, am I not allowed to be happy?” she says, falling back onto her bed and rummaging under her pillow to find her earphones. “Not when you don’t tell me what’s going on. Did you spend the entire day with the newbie?” Lauren nods, “She’s next door, too. She’s really nice. I’m showing her around tomorrow. Plus, I’ve invited her to sit with us at breakfast and stuff.”

Jacob bites his lip, “Mahogany’s not gonna be too happy about that. She was already acting like a jealous bitch just from seeing you touch the girls hand.” Lauren shrugs, “She’s gonna have to get over it. We were never together, I don’t see what she’s so mad about.”

“Harsh, Jauregui. You know M’s head over heels for you.” Lauren sighed, plugging her earphones in, “All she wants is sex, and if that’s what she wants, then fine. But it’s not what I want. So, I’m not gonna entertain her when I could be looking for a real relationship.” “With the newb?” “Her name’s Camila.” Lauren replied, turning the volume of her music up.

“Whatever. Just, be careful, okay? Relationships aren’t the most important things right now. Remember to look after yourself, since all you do is look after people.” Jacob replied, placing his hands behind his head and lying back against his bed, closing his eyes. “Since when did you get so zen? I swear, I leave you alone for one day.” Lauren said, smiling. Jacob laughed and turned around to face the wall, “Night, loser.”

Lauren reached over to her nightstand and switched her lamp off, closing her eyes and smiling to the music flowing through her mind, “Night.”

**  
**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, guys! 
> 
> Gold, written by:
> 
> oblitero.tumblr.com


	2. II

"Rise and shine, motherfucker!" Jacob says, jumping on top of Lauren. "I fucking hate you." Lauren mutters into her pillow, shoving Jacob off of her. She lifts herself out of bed, stretching before checking the time. 8:43 AM.

She had 22 minutes before Camila would be outside, waiting for her. For some reason, she was nervous. She wasn't really sure why she was nervous, because, well, Lauren was never nervous, ever (which was ironic for someone who suffered regular anxiety attacks).

She had always been the confident type. The outgoing one, the unafraid and proud one. She frowned, rubbing at her head and checking the time to see that it now was 8:50.

She quickly jumped into the shower, not wanting to waste any time. When she got out, Jacob was sat on his bed, looking over at her and wiggling his eyebrows. "What? Do I have something on my face?" Lauren asked, frowning.

"No, but we do have a visitor..." Jacob said, looking over to the door. Stood there was Camila, smiling nervously. Lauren suddenly felt her face heat up. "Hi. Nice towel.” Camila said, pointing to the towel wrapped around Lauren's head.

"You're hilarious," She says, a frown plastered on her face as she grabbed her clothing and took it into the bathroom.

Lauren could feel her face getting hotter and hotter.

"Oh, by the way: Camila, that asshole is Jacob. Jacob, that's Camila." Lauren said through the door. Camila sent Jacob a small wave and he smiled back at her.

Lauren exits the bathroom, fully dressed and a little less red than she was before. "So, do you guys share a room together?" Camila asks, shuffling slightly where she stood. "Sit down" Lauren mouthed towards Camila, shooting her a quick smile. The smaller girl obliged, sitting on the edge of Lauren’s bed and smiling. "Unfortunately," Jacob says, sighing, "It's awful. She snores." "Jacob!" Lauren exclaimed, hitting the boy’s arm.

He raises his hands in mock surrender and Lauren rolls her eyes. Camila frowns, "Aren't they concerned? Y'know, 'cause you're a guy and a girl sharing a room?" The smaller girl asks, confused.

Lauren laughed, "No. The entire staff here know that we’re both completely gay and shockingly repulsed by each other." Lauren replied, smirking at Jacob. Camila doesn't react to Lauren mentioning her sexuality and shrugs, "They sound pretty relaxed here, then." Lauren nods, towel drying her hair until it was remotely dry, "Yeah, it's okay," Lauren reaches over onto her bed to retrieve her phone and checks the time. 9:10 AM.

Lauren was slightly shocked by the fact that Camila hadn't had a response to her mentioning her sexuality. Usually if Lauren were to mention anything, people would interrogate her, ask her too many questions. But Camila was different. And Lauren was starting to understand that now.

“You’re repulsed by me?” Jacob asks, pouting. Both Lauren and Camila laugh as they exit the room and head to breakfast.

“Repulsed is a strong word…” Lauren says, laughing slightly, “A better word would probably be disgusted.” “In what way is that better?” Jacob asks and Camila laughs. The three of them make their way to the den room and get in line for their food.

“Okay so,” Lauren says, grabbing a carton of juice and placing it onto her tray, “It’s monday today so I won’t have that much time to show you around, but I will show you the ropes and explain what we do during the week.” Lauren finished, walking over to their usual table, Camila following close behind.

“Thanks, again.” Camila says, smiling nervously as Jacob sat down beside Mahogany. Camila opted to sit by Lauren, opposite Jacob. “Who’s your little friend?” Mahogany asks, raising an eyebrow and gesturing towards Camila.

Lauren rolls her eyes, “Mahogany, Camila. Camila, Mahogany.” “Hi.” Camila says, smiling slightly at Mahogany. Mahogany barely gives her a glance before focusing all of her attention on Lauren. “Don’t tell me you’re cheating on me, Lauren.” she says and Lauren groans, “We aren’t, nor were we, nor will we ever be dating, Mahogany. Jesus christ.” Mahogany smirks, knowing she’d aggravated Lauren.

“Oh- oh no. Lauren wasn’t- She’s just showing me around-” Camila starts but Mahogany stops her, “Shut it, newbie. I didn’t ask you.” Lauren stands up, grabbing her tray with one hand and Camila’s hand with the other, “You’re a fucking rude, annoying, asshole, Mahogany. Come on Camila.” Lauren said, walking away, her hand still holding onto Camila’s.

Lauren and Camila ended up sitting somewhere different, away from both Mahogany, and Jacob. When she looked over towards their usual spot, she saw Mahogany by herself. Jacob had gone and sat on the couch, finishing his breakfast in peace.

That was what she liked about Jacob. He was never confrontational, and always rational. He wasn’t someone who picked sides. She turned back to face Camila, noticing she wasn’t eating her food. “I’m really sorry about Mahogany. She’s a jackass. She loves to fuck with people, I’m pretty sure it’s her favourite pass-time.” This earns a small laugh from Camila. “Seriously, don’t take it personally. She hates everyone. Also, she’s not my ex, she was just a fling. I can assure you I have a better taste than ‘rude, ignorant asshole’.”

This time Camila laughs a little more and Lauren smiles. She notices their hands are still clasped together and releases the smaller girl’s hand, grabbing her juice box and taking a sip out of it. “Anyways, as I was saying before Little Miss Jerkoff got involved,” Lauren began, raking a hand through her hair, “Basically, because today’s monday, we don’t really have that much free time,” Camila nods, finally taking a bite out of her pancake.

“So, we have breakfast till 11. Then 11 to 12:30 is school stuff. You won’t have any of your school work yet because you’re usually given your work by your parents on visitation day, so you can totally help me out with my work,” Lauren said, giving Camila a wink. Camila laughs, nodding so that Lauren could carry on.

“12:30 to 1:30 is lunch, then more school work, then we have dinner and after dinner is ‘clinic activities’. Sounds amazing, right?” Lauren asks, sarcasm dripping from her voice. Camila laughs again, “Sounds wonderful.” Lauren smiles, “I think tonight’s ‘activity’ is ‘how to deal with anger’.” Lauren laughs.

“Do they have an activity along the lines of ‘how to get your shit together so you aren’t institutionalized’?” Camila asks. Lauren smiles sadly, sensing the seriousness of Camila’s words, “Look on the bright side: at least it’s not bingo. Plus, after activities we have free time so I can show you around a little then?” Camila nods, smiling slightly.

“Oh, uh, question… Where do you make phone calls?” Camila asks. “Oh, outside here, actually. There’s like, a phone in each hallway.” Lauren replies. “Do you think I could make a call after breakfast?” Lauren shrugs, “Sure, but you’d have to be quick. They’re really weird about punctuality around here.”

A couple more minutes of small-talk and eating later, Camila heads off to make her phone call and Lauren waits for her at the doors of the den room. Lauren had been pretty good since she had gotten admitted into the clinic. The thoughts had died down a little, and her habits had even lessened.

After finishing her phone call, Camila walked back towards the den room to meet Lauren. Camila had barely been here a day and she already hated it. Not that it was a badly put together place, because it really was good, but, she really didn’t want to be there. Hell, she didn’t even think she needed to be.

She just wishes that they’d left her as she left herself, alone- Camila stops, placing her hand to her chest. She closes her eyes, taking in a few deep breaths. She didn’t want to relive that night. She couldn’t. It was too much for her.

She composes herself before quickly walking over towards Lauren. Lauren sees her and smiles, “Is it okay if we quickly head back to my room? I forgot my work.” Camila nods, following Lauren back to the room.

Lauren quickly entered the code for her room before opening the door. She grabs her work before closing the door behind her. Just as they were about to walk to the main classroom the clinic had provided for them, Lauren turns back to her door and enters the code, opens the door, then shuts it again. Lauren then repeats this action another 3 times.

“Sorry, I have to check-” Lauren began but Camila stopped her, “It’s fine.” Lauren smiled slightly before they both headed off.

A couple hours later and there was only 10 more minutes left of class time before both Lauren and Camila could head off to dinner. Mahogany had spotted both Camila and Lauren at the beginning of class and had began to make rude comments, but Camila mainly ignored them. Lauren on the other hand, had tried to get up and say something back to Mahogany, but Camila had stopped her.

“How are you so good at that?” Lauren asked, studying Camila slightly. Camila had kindly offered to help out with one of Lauren’s assignments, so she was studying that carefully. Absentmindedly, she answered, “Do what?”

Lauren quickly glimpsed down at the younger girl’s arms to see that they were covered. Camila had decided to wear a hoodie today which covered up the bandages well.

Lauren couldn’t help but wonder why, but she never asked. She just knew that Camila would tell her in her own time. And if she never told her, then Lauren was okay with that, because it really was none of her business.

“Stay so calm.” Lauren replied, balling her fists when Mahogany walks past their table and kicks Camila’s chair. Lauren goes to stand up, but Camila stops her (again).

“I just learned to deal with it,” Camila said, finally looking up at Lauren. “I mean, there are always people you’re going to disagree with, so why bother with them? It’s just a waste of your time, y’know? You could be doing much better things than responding to their petty actions.” Camila said, giving Mahogany a false smile.

Lauren laughs when she notices how offended Mahogany looks and Camila smiles proudly before finishing off Lauren’s assignment and handing it to her, “I tried to copy your handwriting as best as I could, but-” Lauren shakes her head, tapping Camila’s hand, “No, no, it’s perfect. Thank you, by the way. I never really did get the hang of balancing equations.” Lauren laughs.

Camila scoots her chair closer to Lauren and shakes her head slightly, “It really isn’t as hard as you think. Look,” Camila begins, writing down an equation for Lauren to balance. Lauren wasn’t really listening to her, though. She was too focused on Camila herself. The way her hair fell over her shoulders, how she moved her hands animatedly as she spoke. Lauren was intrigued by the girl sat next to her.

“You get it?” Camila asks. “What? Yeah, yeah, totally.” Lauren replies, smiling. Camila rolled her eyes and checked the time on the clock, “It’s dinner now, right?” Lauren nods and Camila stands up, “I’m gonna make a quick phone call. Meet you in the den room?” Lauren nods, standing up and grabbing her things.

Camila heads off to make her phone call and all of a sudden, Lauren felt really interested in why Camila kept going to the phone to make phone calls. She knew the first couple of days could be rough, but, she’d already made around 7 phone calls in one day. Lauren gathered her work and quietly made her way out of the room to see that Camila had gone to the phone nearest to the den room.

Lauren walked over towards the waiting room hallway and sat down on one of the chairs. A little to her left was the den room door, and if Lauren peered behind the wall, she would be able to see Camila. But she didn’t have to, because she could already hear the girl.

“Mom, please, I’m fine I swear, I-” Lauren bites her lip as she listens to the smaller girl, “No, I know, but, you don’t understand, let me just-” Camila stops again and Lauren could swear she could feel her heart break when she heard the smaller girl utter a sob.

“Mom, I hate it here.” Lauren hears Camila say and this time Lauren actually does feel pained. Did Camila really hate it here that much? Was Lauren not good enough? Lauren had done everything she could think of to make Camila feel welcome, so why did she want to leave so badly?

Lauren shakes her head, rubbing her forehead. She knew they were just thoughts in her head, but nobody knew how much they really distressed her.

After a few more minutes, Camila’s phone call ends and she walks over to the den room doors and pushes them open. Moments later, Lauren follows, trying not to seem too suspicious. “Hey, are you okay?” Lauren asked Camila as she sat down beside her. Camila pulled her sleeves over her hands and smiled sadly, “Yeah, no, I’m fine. You?”

The smaller girl’s eyes were red and Lauren felt awful. “Have I not made you feel welcome enough? I’m sorry if I haven’t, I really did try, I mean, you could tell me what I did wrong and I’ll-” “Lauren?” “Yeah?”

“Did you hear me on the phone?” Camila asks. Lauren nods and Camila sighs, “It’s not your fault I want to leave, it’s mine. I just want out, y’know?” Lauren nods in understanding before Camila stands up, “I promise you it’s not your fault,” Camila rakes both her hands through her hair and rubs her face, “You ready to get some food?” Lauren nods again, feeling slightly reassured that Camila’s hatred of the clinic wasn’t entirely her fault.

Once they’d eaten their food, they headed over to the circle of chairs. Lauren spotted Jacob and sat by him just as Mahogany did the same. “No fighting. Not while I’m in the middle, okay?” Jacob told Mahogany and Lauren and both the girls nodded.

Camila sits a couple of chairs down from Lauren and Lauren leans over, whispering into Camila’s ear, “There is a free chair next to me, you know.” Camila bit her lip, looking to Lauren hopefully, “I wouldn’t be bothering you guys?” Lauren frowns, “Of course not. Just ignore Mahogany: that’s my plan.” Camila nods, sitting down in the seat beside Lauren.

All of a sudden, the den room doors burst open and a flood of teenagers walked through, including Dee.

Dee walks over to the middle of the circle and smiles at everyone, “Okay, guys. Today, we’re going to be talking about how you can control your anger!” Everyone collectively groans and both Lauren and Mahogany couldn’t help but laugh.

Dee turns around, raising an eyebrow at the girls, “Miss Jauregui and Miss Lox, assuming you both find this so entertaining, I’m sure you could give us a quick demonstration on what to do during aggravating situations?”

Lauren froze but stood up, brushing a hand through her hair, Mahogany standing up after her and crossing her arms, “Okay, Mahogany: you’re the aggressor, Lauren: you’re the retaliator.” Dee says and Lauren sighs, turning to face Mahogany. Camila gives her a small thumbs up and Lauren smiles slightly.

“Hey, Lauren. I’m talking to you.” Mahogany says, staring at Lauren. Lauren crosses her arms and raises her eyebrows, “Hey, Jauregui, listen to me when I’m talking to you.” Mahogany says again, giving Lauren a little shove.

Still, Lauren does nothing. Mahogany shoves Lauren again, a little harder. When Mahogany goes to do it once more, Lauren grabs hold of the girl’s wrist and smiles, “Personally, I think you’re pathetic and you should really stop invading my personal bubble before I break your wrist,” Lauren lets go and turns to Dee, “Was that okay?”

Dee sighs and nods, “sit back down, girls.

Lauren walks back over to her seat beside Camila and smiles. Camila gives her a look and she groans, “What? I had to do something.” Camila shrugs and Lauren turns back to face Dee again.

An hour of anger management later and everyone was free to do whatever they wanted. Most people went to go watch movies in the movie room and some stayed in the den room to play pool or watch tv.

“So, do you, uh, want me to show you around?” Lauren asked Camila hesitantly. “If you wouldn’t mind.” Camila replied, smiling softly at the older girl. There was something about Camila that Lauren couldn’t quite place. Lauren would use the word innocent but, everyone lost their innocence before coming in here.

“Okay, so, obviously this is the den room, where everyone eats, watches tv, activities are here, blah blah.” Lauren said, guiding the smaller girl through the large room.

Lauren opens the doors and exits the den room, Camila following close behind, “Main hallway. We have the waiting room, the visitation room and the front desk here,” Lauren pointed in front of them.

“Down there are rooms,” Lauren said, pointing to the left and then to the right, “And that room is where we get given our medication and all that shit.” Lauren said, pointing to a small opening in the wall where the nurse would usually stand behind and hand you your prescription drug.

“Oh, and there’s a library down there, which is almost always empty, which is nice when you want to catch up on your reading and stuff,” Lauren said, smiling, “But, yeah, that’s about it.” Lauren said, even though she knew she was lying. There was another place, but she wasn’t ready to share that with anyone yet.

“And you already know the timetable and stuff so, there isn’t really much else I can show you.” Camila nodded, smiling, “Thanks, a lot. Seriously, I really appreciate it. Uh, I think I’m gonna head off to my room, though. I’ll meet you at your room usual time tomorrow, though?” Camila asked.

 **  
** Lauren nodded, “Yeah, no, totally. The first day is usually crappy so just relax. If you do need me, though, like, I’m only a knock away. Literally.” this earned a laugh from the smaller girl and Lauren smiled, “Night, Camila.” “Night, Lauren.” Camila replied, smiling and heading down the hallway to her room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, guys! 
> 
> Gold, written by:
> 
> oblitero.tumblr.com


	3. III

Lauren had always hated Sundays.

She wasn’t sure why, but that particular day of the week had always been a bit of a downer for her. Maybe because it was the end of the weekend. Or maybe because she was never really sure as to whether she should relax or work.

Today was Sunday and Lauren had woken up in a weird mood. She wasn’t angry (she _definitely_ wasn’t happy). She was empty. She was tired. She checked her watch to see that it was almost 9 AM.

She groaned, dragging herself out of bed, before finding a note on her nightstand,

_"Hey, Jauregui. I tried waking you up at our usual time but you were out like a light so I let you sleep. See you later, loser - Jacob xo”_

Lauren smiled slightly but grimaced when she felt the stabbing pain in her left temple. She rubbed at her scar, but the pain only got worse.

Just as she was about to walk into the bathroom, there was a knock on her door. She sighs, walking over to the door and opening it to see Camila. She was wearing another hoodie, this one being maroon, along with some grey jeans. “Is this a bad time?” Camila asks and Lauren shrugs, walking back into her room.

Camila follows and stands awkwardly at the side of the room. Lauren sighs, “You can sit down, you know. It’s not a hard concept to grasp.” Lauren said, kicking the door shut a little too hard. Camila flinches at the noise and heads towards the door, “I’m sorry, I'll go-”

“Wait, no, Camila,” Lauren began, grabbing hold of Camila’s hands, “I’m sorry. I’m in a weird mood. Please, sit down. I’m sorry. Don't leave.” Lauren said, biting her lip. She didn’t want this girl to hate her.   
  
Camila nods slightly, sitting on the edge of Lauren’s bed.

Lauren grabbed a random t-shirt and a pair of black jeans from her drawer before turning back to face Camila, “Could you turn around for a sec?” Camila nods, turning to face the wall as Lauren undressed.

“So, what’s the matter?” Camila asked as Lauren pulled her pants over her legs. Lauren thinks for a moment before answering, “Do you ever have those days, where you kind of just…” When Lauren doesn’t finish, Camila just nods in understanding. Camila understood how hard it could be to describe any form of depression, “Yeah. All the time.”

Lauren pulls her t-shirt over her head and sighs, rubbing at her face, “You ready?” Camila turns around nods, “It’s Sunday today, right?” Lauren nods in return, and Camila smiles slightly, “That means no classwork, right?” Lauren nods again but frowns, “You still need to get your work from your parents-” “I told them not to come.” Camila said.

Lauren frowns again, “What? Why?” Camila shrugs, “Because I don’t want to see them right now. Come on,” Camila said, taking Lauren’s hand in hers, “Let’s go get something to eat and then I’m gonna cheer you up.” Lauren smiles at Camila’s efforts, “You don’t have to-” Camila stops and looks back at the taller girl, “No, but I want to.”

Lauren smiles and allows Camila to drag her along with her to the den room for some breakfast.

After they had both filled their trays with food they headed off to find somewhere to sit. Lauren saw Jacob and Mahogany sat together and sighed, “Can we not sit by them today? I can’t deal with Mahogany right now.” Lauren said. Camila nodded, “Of course. Come on,” she replied, walking over to an empty table at the edge of the room.

Lauren was distant, and she wasn’t eating her food, either. “You’re not gonna eat anything?” Camila asked. Lauren shook her head, “Not hungry.” Lauren replied, pushing her tray away from her. Camila frowned and handed Lauren the granola bar she’d picked up, “Come on, at least it this. Otherwise you’re gonna be a zombie till lunch.”

Lauren half-smiled at the smaller girl and accepted the food. Once they had both finished eating, Camila guided them back down the hallway from which they came and towards their rooms. “We’re going back to our rooms?” Lauren asked, sounding a little disappointed. Camila laughed, entering the code to open her door, “Do you trust me?” Camila asked Lauren as she pushes the door open and walks into her room.

“I mean, I have known you for like, a week.” Lauren replies and Camila playfully shoves her. “You’re _hilarious_ , Jauregui.” “What can I say? I was born to be a comedian.” Camila rolls her eyes and walks over to her bed.

“Okay, so, when I was little and I was having a bad day, my parents and I would find all the blankets we could, and get all the mattresses together to build a giant fort, so, that is what we’re going to do right now.”

Lauren laughs, “Camz, you do realise I'm legally an adult, right?” Lauren felt her face heat up as soon as she’d said the newly found nickname. Camz? Where had that even come from? Lauren mentally cursed herself but she sees Camila smile, “You’re never too old to build a fort, Lo.” Camila replied and Lauren felt a little bit better.

She could definitely get used to calling Camila ‘Camz’.

The girls stare at each other for a little longer before Camila snaps out of it, “Uh, okay, so, go to your room and bring your blanket and your pillow, okay?” Lauren nods, leaving Camila’s room and heading to her own.

She quickly punches in the code to open her door and enters her room. She stops in the doorway and exits her room once more before stepping back inside. She repeated this until it felt okay to her. Lauren had always been really conscious of her ‘rituals’ and could usually control them, but her mood didn’t help right now so she was pretty defenseless.

She folds her blanket and places it on top of her pillow before tucking it under her arm and exiting her room, closing the door behind her. She goes to open it and close it again but stops herself. She stares at the door for about a minute or so before heading back to Camila’s room, happy that she had overcome at least one of her urges to complete a ritual today.

“Knock knock,” Lauren says through the door. Seconds later, the door opens and Camila grins, “Are you ready to build the best fort _ever?!_ ” Camila asked enthusiastically. Lauren just laughed, “Sure thing. Where do you want these?” She asks, gesturing to her blanket and pillow.

Camila smiled, “Just put them on my desk for now. Come on; we got work to do, Jauregui.”

A good twenty minutes later and the girls had managed to build a great, if not the greatest, fort of all time. Because Camila didn’t share a room with anyone there was an extra mattress in her room, so they took both Camila's mattress and the spare mattress, turned them on their sides and pushed them against the bare wall.

They had then placed Lauren’s blanket in the space between the mattresses, the spare blanket over the top of the mattresses and Camila’s blanket on top of them. They also had a few pillows surrounding them.

“Pretty cool, huh?” Camila asked, leaning against one of the mattresses. Lauren grinned, “Not too bad.” Lauren sighed, lying down on the blanket and staring up at the white blanket above them. Camila lay beside her and followed Lauren's gaze.

“What are we looking at?” Camila asked as they both continued to stare at the white blanket. Lauren laughed, “Nothing, I was just thinking.” “About?” Lauren shrugs, turning on her side to face the smaller girl, “I don’t know. Stuff. Life. Philosophical shit.”

Camila laughs, “You think a lot then?” Lauren nodded, “A bit too much, if you ask me.” Lauren said, instinctively rubbing the scar on her left temple. The pain was still there, but it was more of a dull ache now.

Camila frowns when she notices the scar but decides to change the topic, “So, Miss Jauregui, I remember the day we first met, we had a brief discussion on music. I would love to carry that conversation on.”

Lauren sits up, smiling, “Totally. Who’s your favourite artist?” Camila blushes slightly and bites her lip, “I’m a bit of a One Direction dork myself, what about you?” Lauren laughs, “I like One Direction! They’re cool,” Lauren began, combing a hand through her hair, “Well, I’ve always really loved John Mayer. And Lana Del Rey, and, well,” Lauren sits up straighter and points to her t-shirt.

It was a band t-shirt with ‘The 1975’ printed on it, “The 1975.” “Do you play any instruments?” Camila asked and Lauren’s eyes lit up, “Oh my God! I’ll be right back!” Lauren says, slipping out from under the blanket and leaving Camila’s room.

Moments later, Lauren comes running back into the room holding a blue electric guitar. Camila immediately sits up, “No way!” Lauren just grins in response to the girl before crawling back into the fort and squeezing her guitar in with her, “Do you play?” Lauren asks the smaller girl. Camila nods, smiling shyly.

“Here. Try it out. Sorry I don't have my amp with me, though.” Lauren says, handing Camila the guitar. Camila stares at her in shock, “Really?” Lauren nods, “Of course. Come on.” Camila takes the guitar and plays a couple of chords before playing an actual song. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes before singing along to what she was playing,

_“Shadows settle on the place,_

_That you left,_

_Our minds are troubled by the emptiness._

_Destroy the middle,_

_It's a waste of time,_

_From the perfect start to the finish line.”_

Lauren smiles, knowing the song and joining in,

_“And if you're still breathing,_

_You're the lucky ones._

_'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs._

_Setting fire to our insides for fun._

_Collecting names of the lovers that went wrong,_

_The lovers that went wrong.”_

__

“I take it you like Daughter?” Lauren asked and Camila grins, her cheeks a little red, “That was really nice. Your voice is beautiful.” Camila says and Lauren shakes her head, “Thanks but, did you even hear yourself? Now _that_ is what I would call beautiful."

Camila bites her lip, her cheeks definitely red now. "Too cheesy?" Lauren asks. Camila nods and they both laugh, "What can I say, I'm a romantic and a pleaser. Cheesy compliments are what I was born to make."

Camila laughs again and so does Lauren. Lauren couldn't remember a time where she was this happy in a Sunday. Probably because there wasn't one.

Lauren smiled at Camila and sighed, this time, her sigh leaning new towards the 'content' side of life, "Thank you, for this. And just, thanks in general." Lauren said, biting her lip.

The smaller girl blushed, "Any time. Seriously, I'm here, okay?" Camila replied.

Camila had only known Lauren for around a week, but she could already tell what kind of a person she was. Lauren was the kind of person that would always put everyone else's problems before hers, regardless of the situation.

Camila admired that, but when the time came for Lauren to listen to her own feelings, she never did. Lauren didn't open up easily, but it wasn't because she didn't want to, but because she felt guilty doing so.

Lauren nodded and Camila proceeded to play another song on the guitar,

_"Love of mine,_

_Someday you will die,_

_But I'll be close behind,_

_I'll follow you, Into the dark."_

Lauren smiles when she recognises the song and shuts her eyes as she sings along,

_"No blinding light,_

_Or tunnels, to gates of white,_

_Just our hands clasped so tight,_

_Waiting for, the hint of a spark."_

When Camila noticed Lauren singing, she smiled and continued to play the guitar but stopped her own singing. Lauren sang on and Camila couldn't help but smile at the girl sat before her, singing her heart out with her eyes shut,

_"If heaven and hell decide, that they both are satisfied,_

_Illuminate the no's, on their vacancy signs,_

_If there's no one beside you, when your soul embarks,_

_Then I'll follow you into the dark."_

Lauren sings the rest of the song without any trouble and can't help but blush when she opens her eyes to see Camila smiling at her.

"Was that okay?" Lauren asked nervously and Camila just nodded her head, smiling at the older girl, "It was more than okay."

 **  
** Maybe Sunday's weren't as bad as Lauren thought they were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading, guys! Have a nice day and be kind to yourselves!
> 
> Gold, written by:
> 
> oblitero.tumblr.com


	4. IV

Camila wakes up to the sound of knocking at her door. Exactly 5 knocks, to be exact. She frowns, scratching her head sleepily before opening the door to find Lauren grinning like an idiot. “I only knocked five times.” Lauren said excitedly, as if this were an achievement.

Which it was for Lauren. It was a big step in the right direction because lately, the older girl’s habits were getting worse.

She had bad days and good days, just like everyone else.

Camila smiled back, engulfing her friend in a hug. “I’m super proud of you, Lo.” They stood like that for what Camila thought was hours. They both hesitated as they pulled back and stopped directly in front of each others faces.

Camila’s breath catches in her throat and she takes a step back, feeling her face heat up. _What was that, Camila?_ The smaller girl thinks to herself

Camila clears her throat, rubbing at her arms and realising that they weren’t covered. Lauren notices the panicked look in Camila’s eyes and grabs the smaller girls hand, “It’s okay. I promise it’s okay. You don’t have to hide them from me, I swear.” Lauren says sincerely, rubbing Camila’s hand with her thumb.

Camila’s expression softens and she bites her lip. She had never been comfortable with people seeing her scars, and only after almost two weeks of knowing the older girl, Camila felt like she could maybe start wearing short sleeved t-shirts again.

The bandages that had been wrapped around both her wrists had been taken off a week ago. She now had two moderately large scars running down her forearm, starting from her wrist and ending at the centre of her forearm.

She hated herself a little bit more every time she saw them, and tried to cover them up as much as she could. But she was starting to realise that they were going to be a part of her for a while, so she may as well get used to seeing them.

Camila takes in a deep breath and looks up at Lauren, their hands still clasped tightly together. “Okay.” Camila couldn’t help but smile when she saw the broad smile appear on Lauren’s face. The taller girl then engulfs Camila in a warm, long lasting hug for God knows how long.

Lauren is the one to finally break the hug. She smiles down at the smaller girl, “We should probably go. Otherwise we’ll be late for breakfast and I am planning on stuffing my face before I have to endure any form of school work today.”

Camila laughs at the older girl’s words before grabbing a change of clothes and heading into her bathroom.

**  
  
**

One amazing breakfast and their first class later, both girls were sat together for their last class of the day. It had barely been 15 minutes and Lauren was already groaning. “What’s up?” Camila asks absentmindedly as she stared at her own school work.

Lauren let her head fall onto the table, another groan coming from the green eyed girl. All Camila heard was a muffled “Calculus makes me feel homicidal.” before the smaller girl bursted out in laughter, “You probably shouldn't say that while you’re in a mental-health center, Lo.” Lauren groans again and Camila rubs the girl’s back, “There, there. We only have another,” Camila looks up at the clock and laughs, “Two hours and forty minutes left.” Lauren groans once more, her head still pressed against the table.

The rest of the class had gone by smoothly. Lauren had spent the rest of it complaining, and Camila had spent the rest of it trying to explain Lauren’s work to the stubborn girl. There was only ten minutes left before they were allowed to go to dinner.

“It’s literally so pointless. When will I ever use calculus in my life? Ever?” Lauren groans once more and Camila rolled her eyes, “Quit being such a cry baby. Come on, do your work.”

Lauren purses her lips and guesses at least 70% of the answers on the work sheet before folding it up and tucking it in her back pocket. Camila is studying her own work sheet when someone walks past, kicking the table and making her work go flying.

That certain someone happened to be Bradley Simpson.

“Sorry, I must have tripped.” Brad said, a smirk on his face. Camila’s already on the floor, gathering her papers when Lauren goes to say something to Brad, “He’s not worth it, Lo.” The taller girl holds back her urge to shout the profanities that were lingering on the tip of her tongue at the boy as she walked towards Camila and helped the smaller girl gather her work from the floor.

“Wow, looks like the newb is _finally_ wearing a short-sleeve. What happened, Camila? Finally got over yourself?” Brad says and Lauren can’t help herself this time. She storms over to Brad and grabs him by the collar of his shirt, “Go on. Give me one more reason to punch you. Do it.” Lauren taunted, but by then Brad had already given up on his macho act.

“H-Hey, I was, I was only joking! Come on, you know I didn’t mean it!” Brad said. He was shaking and Lauren laughed, releasing the smaller boy. He was nothing when he didn’t have his posse to back him up.

“That’s what I thought.” Lauren said as he escaped back to his own desk. One of the nurses in the room gave Lauren a pointed look and Lauren raised her arms in mock surrender before sitting back down beside Camila.

Camila had her face buried in her work, but Lauren could see the girls shoulders shaking slightly. Quietly, Lauren gathered Camila’s things and ushered the girl out of her chair, wrapping an arm around the smaller girl’s waist before they exited the room together.

When they left, Camila looked up at Lauren, her eyes already puffy and red. “Do I really need to get over myself?” In that moment, Lauren felt her heart break as she watched the girl before her try to suppress her sobs.

The older girl wrapped her arms around Camila and held the smaller girl close to her, “No. Not even a _little_ , okay? Not one bit.” Lauren replied, not once letting go of the smaller girl cuddled up to her side. The older girl walked them both back to Camila’s room, hoping nobody would disturb them.

Camila climbs onto her bed, Lauren trailing after her. As soon as Lauren is on the bed, Camila snakes her arms around the green eyed girl’s waist and cuddles up to her side. Lauren smiles and wraps her own arms around the smaller girl.

“I-It’s like every time I f-fucking try, it gets thrown b-back in my f-fucking face again.” Camila said between sobs. Lauren rubbed circles on the smaller girl’s back with her left hand, stroking the girls hair with her right, “I know, Camz, I know.” Lauren comforted.

Both girls ended up falling asleep and Camila couldn’t remember a time where she’d felt so safe in her life.

**  
  
**

A couple hours later, Camila was the first to wake up. She felt warm arms wrapped around her waist and turned her head to see that she was currently being spooned by Lauren Jauregui. The smaller girl felt her face heat up slightly, but she couldn’t help but smile when she saw the green eyed girl. Camila stared for a little longer than she should have, but she really couldn’t help it.

The older girl just looked so peaceful while she slept, like there wasn’t anything on her mind. Camila smiles sadly, looking up at the clock perched on the wall and realising they should both probably get up.

The smaller girl slides out from under the older girl’s arms and rummages through her drawers for a change of clothes before escaping into the bathroom to change.

Minutes later, Lauren finally wakes up and is a little disappointed to wake up to an empty bed. Camila finally exits the bathroom, wearing her black skinny jeans and a sweater. Lauren frowned because the smaller girl’s arms were covered again.

“You’re awake.” Camila said, smiling. “Is this about what Brad said earlier,” gesturing to the sweater Camila had changed into, “‘Cause if it is I swear-” Camila stopped the older girl, “No, no. Seriously, I’m over that,” Camila said, smiling. Lauren actually believed her and Camila continued, “I’m just cold. I promise.”

Lauren nods, relieved that Camila wasn’t beating herself up about what Brad had said earlier. Lauren stretched and sat up, scratching the back of her neck, “You ready for afternoon activities?” Camila reminded Lauren and the taller girl groaned, looking up at the clock “I was hoping we’d slept through it.”

Camila laughed, blushing slightly when the older girl reminds her of the time they had spent together in each other’s arms. “Come on, Lo. Tonight’s arts and crafts night! It can’t be that bad.” Camila said, taking hold of Lauren’s hands before pulling the older girl up to her feet, “You have way too much faith in this place, Camz.” Lauren said and Camila smacked the older girl’s shoulder as they made their way out of the smaller girl’s room.

“I’m actually kind of excited.” Lauren admits and Camila smiled, “Why’s that, Little Miss ‘I Don’t Participate in Activities’?” Lauren laughed and shoved the smaller girl, “Firstly, _rude_. Secondly, because I haven’t picked up a pencil since I got here and I think it would be good for me to draw again.”

“You draw?” Camila asks and Lauren nods, smiling, “It calms me down. It’s been my go-to stress reliever ever since I could remember.” Camila smiles, nodding in understanding, “That’s like me and music.”

The girls continue their conversation as they enter the den room. They find both Jacob and Mahogany and take their seats beside them, “You’re all anyone seems to be talking about at the moment, Jauregui.” Mahogany says and Jacob chimes in, “Yeah, what did you do?!”

Lauren shrugs, “I didn’t really do much.” “Then why is Brad’s posse looking at you like they’re planning your untimely death?” Mahogany answered and Lauren turned around to see Brad’s group of friends staring her down. Lauren laughs, giving them a little wave before turning back to her friends, “I just shook Brad up a little. Nothing spectacular. He deserved it.” Camila nods in agreement and highfives the older girl, “That he did.”

Jacob and Mahogany share a confused look before focusing on their art pieces. Lauren stands up, turning to face Camila, “I’m gonna go grab some supplies. Any requests?” Camila shook her head, “I think I’m just gonna watch you draw tonight. So no pressure.” The smaller girl adds with a wink.

Lauren rolled her eyes but smiled, heading off to find some moderately good pencils and some paper. Moments later, the girl returns with some paper and a multitude of pencils. Just as she was about to draw, she froze, looking up from the blank piece of paper. “I don’t know what to draw.” She said, biting her lip. “Draw me.” Camila said simply, her head resting in her hand. Lauren laughed, “Okay, but don’t blame me if it’s bad. I’m probably a little rusty.”

Mahogany laughed, looking up, “Your hands work _fine_ , Lauren.” Lauren felt her face heat up and Jacob burst out laughing, Mahogany smirking beside him. Camila just smiled and placed a hand on Lauren’s knee, “Stop doubting yourself.”

Mahogany cringed at the both of them and Lauren nodded, the redness in her face fading slightly. She looked up at Camila once more before she got to work.

A good hour later and the activities session of the night was coming to an end. “That’s it. I’m out. I love you, but I seriously don’t think I can sit and watch you draw all night. Peace.” Mahogany says, sending Lauren a peace sign and leaving the den room. Jacob sighs, pushing his chair back and standing up, “I’m with M on this one, Laur. Night guys.” Jacob said to the two girls before heading off.

Camila yawned, stretching her arms slightly (even though all she’d done is sit and watch Lauren for the last hour).

“You can go too, if you want. Don’t let me keep you.” Lauren mumbles, staring at the piece of paper she was scribbling on. Camila frowned, “Hell no. I wanna see this masterpiece. Plus, who says I want to leave you?”

Lauren looked up at Camila, smiling sheepishly before looking back down at the piece of paper. She added a few more scribbles here and there before sighing. She grabs the piece of paper and hands it to Camila. “Done.”

Lauren cracks her knuckles and frowns when Camila gasps. “I know it’s bad but you don’t have to be rude about it-” Lauren starts, but Camila stops her, “ _Bad?_ If this is classed as _‘bad’_ then your ‘okay’ art pieces must be Picasso equivalent or something. Lauren, this is _amazing_. Seriously, I,” Camila smiles, looking up from the drawing to look at the green eyed girl.

Their eyes lock immediately and neither of them drop their gaze, “I love it.” Camila finishes and Lauren smiles, still unsure, “You- You do?” Camila nods eagerly before fidgeting slightly, “Can I, uh. Can I keep it?” Lauren grins, “Of course you can, you dork.” Camila rolls her eyes and pushes the piece of paper towards Lauren.

“Sign it.” Camila says and Lauren rolls her eyes, “Well, if you _insist_. I’m sure you’ll be able to get a lot of money out of this when I’m rich and famous.”

Camila just laughs and Lauren grabs the pencil again, staring down at the piece of paper and trying to think of what to write. She smiles, thinking of something to write before quickly scribbling it down and signing it afterwards.

Camila takes the piece of paper with a smile before standing up to leave. “Night, Lo.” Camila smiles and Lauren can’t help but smile back, “Night, Camz.”

The younger girl gets as far as the den room door before turning back and walking towards her friend. “Weren’t you going to-” Before Lauren could finish her sentence, the smaller girl places a kiss on the older girl’s cheek and turns back around, leaving Lauren stood in the den room, dumbfounded.

Lauren doesn’t understand _why_ she smiles so much after that, but she doesn’t think much of it: even when she goes to bed, and the smile is just as strong as when the brown eyed girl placed it there.

As soon as Camila gets into bed, she finds the drawing on the bedside table and finally reads the message Lauren had left her:

**  
  
**

_To Camz,_

_I know it’s hard for you, but I just want you to know that you don’t have to hide yourself from me. Ever. I appreciate all of you, especially the parts that you don’t. What I’m trying to say is, I won’t hide myself if you won’t._

_Deal?_

_-Lo_

Camila can feel her smile getting wider by the second and she can’t help but laugh to herself, wondering what she did to have such an amazing friend like Lauren thrown into her life. Camila thinks for a moment before raising her hand to the wall behind her and knocking twice.

“Night Camz!” The smaller girl hears faintly from behind the wall and she laughs, rolling her eyes, “Night, Lo.”

 **  
**Both girls go to sleep with a smile plastered on their face and a newly found nervousness for their day together tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much fluff and angst. I'm getting way too emotional. BT-DUBZ next chapter is quite the development... STAY TUNED!
> 
> As always, Gold is written by, me. AKA
> 
> oblitero on tumblr, erinhasfangs on twitter.
> 
> Have a lovely day and be kind to yourselves!


	5. V

Thursday and Friday had probably been some of the best days of Lauren’s time at the clinic. She had gone to sleep on Wednesday night smiling like a crazy person, and the smile hadn’t really gone away.

 

...Up until Saturday morning.

 

Camila hadn’t showed up outside of Lauren’s room at their usual time, so Lauren had gone to Camila’s room instead. After four knocks, Camila still hadn’t answered the door (which was weird, because Camila was usually up and ready before Lauren).

 

Lauren frowned, knocking once more. When there was no answer, the older girl bit her lip, punching in the code to Camila’s room (which Camila had previously given to her).

 

Lauren walks into Camila’s room to see the younger girl bundled up in blankets. “Camz? Camz, are you awake?” When there’s no response from the younger girl, Lauren walks over to her bed.

 

“Camz, you need to get up, otherwise we’re gonna miss breakfast.” Once again, there was no response, except for Camila turning around to face the wall. Away from Lauren. The older girl sighs, “Come on, today’s visitation. Didn’t you say your friend Dinah was coming today?”

 

Camila finally speaks up and responds almost immediately, “I told her not to come.”

 

Lauren frowns, “Why?” The younger girl doesn’t respond again and Lauren sighs, placing her hand on top of Camila’s, “Camz, please talk to me.”

 

“There’s nothing to talk about, Lauren. Just go to breakfast without me.” Camila spits back, pulling her hand out from underneath Lauren’s.

 

Lauren frowns again, slightly hurt by Camila's words. The older girl stands up from the bed before leaving the room and heading to the closest phone she can find, immediately dialing her friend (of many, many years) Normani’s number.

 

Lauren, throughout her 18 years of life on this world, had been blessed with the two best people she'd ever had the opportunity of meeting: Normani and Ally.

 

They had all met their Freshman year of high school and ever since then have been inseparable (the same could be said about the girls' parents).

 

When Lauren got admitted to the clinic, Normani and Ally promised they would visit Lauren every Saturday. They haven't broken that promise once throughout the past few months.

 

Lauren loved Normani and Ally very much. They were like the older sisters she'd never had. They were always there for her, whenever for whatever.

 

They had always been very patient with Lauren and had always helped her in any way they could. Lauren was eternally grateful for that.

 

Lauren bites her lip, hoping they could be patient with her today, too.

 

“Lauren, hey! Me and Ally will probably be running a little late today, so-” Normani begins but Lauren stops the older girl, “Hey, Mani, that’s actually what I wanted to talk about,” Lauren begins.

 

“Do you think, uh, you guys could visit me next Saturday instead?” “What? Why? You’re not getting worse, are you Lo? Please don’t push us away, for the love of-” “Mani, I’m fine, Jesus. I just, I have some stuff to do today and, yeah. Is next Saturday okay?”

 

Normani sighs, “Fine. But just so you know, Ally isn’t gonna be happy. She’s gonna be ranting about this all day now. So, you owe me one.” Lauren laughs, “Deal. I’ll call you soon, okay?” Normani laughs, “You bet your ass you will. See ya, Lo.”

 

Lauren ends the phone call with a laugh. She can't help but smile. She doesn't know why she was worried before; she knows the girls will always have her back. Always.

 

The older girl checks the time to see that it was just coming to 10:50. She heads straight to the den room and manages to sneak out two trays of food before heading back to her friend’s room. She doesn’t bother knocking and immediately enters the code, opening the door and setting the trays on Camila’s desk

 

“If you don’t want to go to breakfast, breakfast goes to you.” Lauren says. “I’m not hungry.” Camila mumbles, still hiding under the large pile of blankets. Lauren frowns once more before sitting on the spare bed. “What happened to not hiding, Camila? If this is more than just a bad day, you’ve got to tell Dee or something. Or someone. Please. If you won’t talk to me, talk to someone else.”

 

Camila understood Lauren’s serious tone immediately. The older girl only used the younger girl’s full name when she was either being serious, or angry. Camila sat up in bed and rubbed at her forehead, “Please, Lauren, don’t tell Dee. I’m fine, I swear. I’m just having an off day, y’know?”

 

Lauren frowned, biting her lip. She nodded, “Okay, but, please promise me you’ll tell someone if this turns into more than a bad day, alright?” Camila nodded and tried to smile in response, but the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

 

The older girl stood up and retrieved the trays of food from Camila’s desk, handing one of them to her friend. Camila smiled slightly, looking up at the girl, “You really didn’t have to-” Lauren rolls her eyes, “Of course I did. Now shut up and eat your cereal.” Lauren replies, winking at the smaller girl.

 

Camila laughs back at Lauren, a smile creeping up on the younger girl’s face.

 

This one definitely reaching her eyes.

  
  


After breakfast, both girls continued with their day together. While Camila really didn’t want to leave her room, Lauren said that it would probably be best for the smaller girl to be social so that she could try and distract herself from other thoughts.

 

After trying to argue her point, Camila finally gave in and followed Lauren out into the den room where they spent most of their time playing poker with Mahogany and Jacob.

 

Of course, Mahogany ended up winning and everyone had to give her their ‘poker chips’ (which were, in fact, Monopoly dollars that they had ‘borrowed’ from the old board game).

 

When visitation time came, everyone except for Camila, Lauren and a few other people went off to go see their friends. Lauren felt a little bad for not letting Normani and Ally visit her, but there was obviously something up when Camila didn’t want to see this Dinah girl.

 

Lauren had heard so much about ‘the legendary Dinah’, it was crazy. Lauren had to admit that seeing Camila talk about the people she loves with such enthusiasm was adorable, and reminded her of how she felt towards both Ally and Normani.

 

Camila was so excited for visitation and the fact that Dinah could visit her, that it completely confused Lauren when she found out the younger girl had told Dinah not to visit her today.

 

“Lo?” Camila asks. Lauren looks up from her book, “Yeah?” Camila frowns, “Don’t your friends usually visit you on Saturdays?” the younger girl asks, biting at her bottom lip.

 

Lauren stared at the brown eyed girl’s lips before quickly looking back down at her book. What was that, Lauren? You don’t stare at your friend’s lips like that. “Yeah.” The older girl responded as nonchalantly as she could, “So then why aren’t you at visitation?” Camila asked.

 

Lauren replied with a shrug, and Camila frowned again, “Did you cancel on them to look after me?” Lauren places the book in her lap, “I’m not ‘looking after you’. I’m being your friend. Mani and Ally don’t need me right now, plus, they can always visit me next Saturday.”

 

Camila wasn’t sure as to how she should react to this new information. The fact that Lauren had cancelled on her friends just to be with Camila shocked the younger girl, without a doubt.

 

Camila didn’t bother commenting and instead allowed the older girl to continue with her reading.

  
  


An hour and a half later and the teens came flooding back into the den room. Lauren looked over at Camila and could sense her discomfort.

 

Camila tended to be okay when it came to small groups of people, however when it came to large groups of people, that’s when the younger girl began to feel anxious.

 

“Camz?” Lauren asked, standing up from her seat. Camila looked up at the older girl, “Can we uh-” Lauren simply nodded, understanding her friend’s discomfort and taking the younger girl’s hand in her own and walking with her out of the den room.

 

“Are you okay?” Lauren asked, turning to face the younger girl. The look on Camila’s face betrayed her feeble nod and Lauren immediately wrapped her arms around the smaller girl. “I just feel like I’m not getting anywhere. I feel lost, I feel, I- I don’t know how I feel. That’s my problem. I don’t know how I’m meant to fix any of this.” Camila choked out.

 

Lauren felt her heart break as she heard the small sobs coming from the younger girl and the slight shaking of her shoulders. Lauren stroked her friend’s hair, “Let me help you. You don’t have to fix this alone, I swear, I’ll help you glue the pieces back together.”

 

Camila broke away from the older girl and looked up at her, her eyes slightly red and puffy, “You promise?”

 

Lauren takes the younger girl’s hand again, “Come with me.”

 

Confused, the younger girl follows as Lauren drags her through the clinic, their hands still clasped together.

  
  


Many different corridors and flights of stairs later, Lauren and Camila now stand in front of a large metal door, the word ‘exit’ printed in large, bold font above it.

 

“Uh, this isn’t an episode of ‘Prison Break’, Lauren.” the younger girl says, staring between the taller girl and the large exit door.

 

Lauren laughs, rolling her eyes, “Don’t be such a dork. Do you wanna see or not? Because we don’t have to-” “No, no. I wanna see.” Camila says, cutting Lauren off. Lauren simply smiles and pushes against the door handle.

 

Once the door opens, both girls are greeted with a remarkable view of the Miami skyline. Lauren had taken Camila to a place she hadn’t told anyone in the clinic about. The roof.

 

Lauren had discovered the roof after exploring during her first month at the clinic. Nobody went up there because the only thing up there was the old generator room and the old generator was ‘practically useless’ (as Dee had once told Lauren).

 

It was now nearing 8 o’clock and the sun was setting, leaving tints of oranges and pinks in the sky. Lauren could swear she heard Camila gasp and turned around to face her.

 

Their hands were still intertwined but neither of them made an effort to let go.

 

“I come here sometimes when I need to… let go, I guess. When I need to get away from everything. People, my friends, my family, hell, even myself. It’s just so quiet up here.” Lauren says, smiling ever so slightly at the view.

 

Camila couldn’t help but stare. It was hard not to when it came to the green eyed girl. Camila adored the way Lauren looked at things. The way the older girl stared at the view was the way Camila wanted to be stared at. Lauren seemed to take all of it in, admiring each and every part, focusing on anything and everything.

 

Lauren takes Camila over to a small flight of metal stairs that take both girls up onto a smaller roof which Lauren says is the roof to the old generator room. Lauren immediately takes her spot on the roof, lying down and staring up at the orange sky. Camila joins her, sighing contently at the serenity of the place.

 

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Lauren asks, turning her head slightly to face the younger girl. Camila just nods, still too entranced with the view. Lauren props herself up on one elbow and looks down at Camila. Lauren loved the way Camila looked at things. The wonder and the excitement in the younger girl’s eyes always fascinated Lauren. It drew her in.

 

“What are you looking at?” Camila asks, noticing the older girl’s staring. “You.” Lauren replies nonchalantly. Camila scrunches up her nose and sticks her tongue out in return.

 

“I want to tell you why I’m here.” Lauren says, and Camila immediately sits up, crossing her legs and facing the older girl. “Are you sure?” Camila asks. Lauren nods, mimicking Camila’s actions, “I’m sure. Okay, here goes,”

 

Lauren clears her throat slightly before rubbing the back of her neck. Seconds later, she waves at the younger girl sat before her, “Hello, my name’s Lauren Jauregui. I’m 18 years old and I have obsessive compulsive disorder - as you already know. My OCD tends to focus on rituals and these lovely things called intrusive thoughts. Intrusive thoughts being that I will non voluntarily start thinking about really, really disturbing things. And I can’t stop them. They can last for hours, and they can be about anything. Like, relationships, or, violent things or even, uh, sexual things,”

 

Lauren takes a minute to stop, thinking about what she should say next, “My OCD got very bad once I realised how soon school was. I was stressed out of my mind, and one night the thoughts got so bad that I-”

 

Lauren stops, her voice hitching in her throat. Camila notices her friend’s struggle and intertwines their fingers. Lauren’s breath steadies at the touch and she closes her eyes, taking in a deep breath before continuing on with her story.  
  
“I did something that I never thought I’d do,” Lauren takes her left hand from Camila’s grasp before turning her head to the right. The older girl points at the scar on her left temple, “I lost it. I couldn’t take it and I just hit my head, again and again-”

 

Lauren is cut off by Camila this time. The smaller girl leans forward ever so slightly before placing the softest of kisses on the older girl’s left temple. Lauren feels her face heat up but she doesn’t care. She’s enjoying the feeling of Camila’s lips too much.

 

Camila sits back down and Lauren continues, “I was concussed, so my memory is a little foggy, but what I do remember is waking up in the hospital. Seeing the worried look on my parent’s faces, seeing Tay and Chris leaning against each other while they slept in those hospital chairs. That’s what I remember. And I don’t think it will ever leave my memory.”  
  
Lauren found herself playing with Camila’s hands as she spoke. The fact that their hands seemed to fit together almost perfectly made the older girl happy beyond belief. But it was only platonic. Or that’s what Lauren urged herself to believe.  
  
“Three months later and I’m taking Zoloft and seeing a counsellor in a mental health clinic. Four more months to go and then I’m out and hopefully, better. Or at least able to feel in control.” Lauren finishes.

 

“Thank you for telling me,” Camila finally speaks up, “I’m glad you trust me enough to tell me that. And I think it’s only fair if I return the favour-”

 

Lauren stops her, “Wait, no. Don’t tell me if you don’t want to. I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to do.”

 

Camila smiles softly at the older girl’s compassion and sighs, “No. I need to. It’s about time I start trusting people- trusting you. It’ll be hard but, I need to do this for myself.”

 

Lauren smiles, still fiddling with the younger girl’s hands. “Well, whenever you’re ready, Camz.”

 

Camila shuts her eyes for a second before taking a deep breath and beginning her story.

 

“Hi. My name’s Camila- actually, fun fact, my full name is really Karla Camila Cabello Estrabao-” Lauren stops her, giggling slightly “Karla? Oh my God that is so cute.”

 

Camila raises her eyebrows at the older girl. Lauren bites her lip, still giggling. “I’m sorry. Carry on.”

 

Camila nods, “Okay. My name is Camila Cabello. I’m 17 years old and I have severe anxiety and depression. I tend to have anxiety attacks a lot. I don’t know why, exactly, I’m like this. I have two loving parents and the best little sister anyone could ask for. I go to a good school, I have amazing friends,” Camila says, gesturing to Lauren slightly, “My life is fine. It’s just me. I’m not fine. And I don’t know why. And I want to get better but it’s so hard. Especially when you feel like you’re not worth it,”  
  
Lauren wants to cut in, to tell Camila that she is worth it, and that she deserves to be able to love herself and get better, but she doesn’t. She lets Camila carry on, “Anyways, one night I wasn’t feeling particularly amazing. I don’t even know what set me off, I just, I felt so low, Lauren. I’d never felt so low before. I was so scared. Everything felt pointless to me. And with that mindset, I,” Camila pauses, looking up at Lauren, a tear rolling down her cheek, “I tried to finish things.”

 

Camila looks back down towards the ground. She removes her hands from Lauren’s grasp and rolls up the sleeves of her sweater to reveal two large scars on both her arms, both scars beginning at her wrist and ending at around the middle of her forearm.

 

Lauren had seen them before, but this time Camila wasn’t hiding them.

 

“You’re beautiful.” Lauren says.

 

Camila looks up, confused by Lauren’s statement, “What?”

 

“I said you’re beautiful. These,” Lauren says, gently stroking the younger girl’s scars with her thumbs, “These don’t make you any less beautiful. Imperfections make you who you are, Camila. Don’t be ashamed of them. Don’t hide them. They’re there to show that you’re here, and that you beat it. And that you’re beating it every day,” Lauren finishes, mimicking Camila’s earlier action by placing a chaste kiss on each scar.  
  
“And I just want you to know that I promise.” Lauren says, intertwining their fingers once more. “Promise what?” Camila questions, forgetting their conversation outside of the den room.

 

Lauren smiles gently before linking her pinkies with Camila’s, “I told you I’d ‘help you glue the pieces back together’. And I will. I promise.”

 

Camila can feel her face blushing ever so slightly, but she doesn’t care. Because in this moment, she knows she’s happy. She’s happy here with Lauren and that’s all she could ever need.

  
  


A couple more deep and meaningful (and slightly philosophical) conversations later, and the girls realise they have to go. They both know that if they’re not in their rooms by 10:30, someone will end up looking for them. And if they were caught up here, they’d be in a lot of trouble (even though Lauren knows no one ever comes up onto the roof, she doesn’t want to risk her and Camila getting caught).

 

“Wow,” Lauren yawns, stretching her arms out as she walks back down the winding corridors with Camila, “I’m beat.” Camila nods in agreement, giggling while leaning into Lauren slightly.

 

Minutes later and both girls are stood outside of Camila’s room. “So, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” Lauren asks, hoping that Camila will in fact meet her outside of her room tomorrow morning. Camila nods, biting her lip and grinning slightly, “Bright and early. Tomorrow’s waffle day. And you know we gotta get there before-” “‘Before all the banana slice topping runs out’. Yeah, yeah. Heard it before, Cabello.” Lauren says, winking at the younger girl.  
  
Camila laughs, shoving Lauren “You’re such a dork, Jauregui. Goodnight.” Camila turns to open her door, entering the code before quickly turning around and wrapping her arms around Lauren’s neck.

 

Lauren is surprised by the sudden contact but is not at all bothered by it. She embraces the younger girl back and Camila sighs, “Thank you for tonight. I don’t think you know how much I appreciate it.”

 

“Funny, I was about to say the same thing to you.” Lauren replies, smiling as she buries her head in the crook of Camila’s neck.

 

The girls are forced to release each other when they realise it’s 10:30. Lauren links their pinkies together, “I meant everything I said tonight. Don’t forget that.”

 

Camila shakes her head, “Never.” Lauren shoots Camila one last smile before heading to her room.

 

It’s safe to say both Camila and Lauren fall asleep that night with content smiles plastered on their faces.

  
Well, that is until both girls realise they have feelings for the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry this took so damn long to update. I was on vacation and didn't have access to a laptop. But it's here now! Chapter 5! Hope you guys liked it.
> 
> As always, Gold is written by oblitero on tumblr, @jauresistance on twitter
> 
> Don't forget to be kind to yourselves <3


	6. IMPORTANT

**A/N: Hey guys so Gold has officially moved straight to wattpad. Here's the link:** _https://www.wattpad.com/story/41900644-gold-fifth-harmony-lauren-camila-camren-fanfiction_

**and my wattpad account is** _summerpsycho_

**oh, by the way, chapter 6 has been posted on wattpad.**   
  
**as always thanks for reading, feel free to message me on twitter/tumblr**   
  
**twitter:** _voguemax_   
**tumblr:** _oblitero_


End file.
